Friday, February 15, 2008

Haiku Friday

In-laws strike again
Sent box of junk to my kids
For Valentine's Day

Bath mitts, candy hearts
Twenty-four dollars to ship
Stuff worth six dollars

Sent it Express Mail
Signature required, yes
More money than sense

I will not listen
To whining of being poor
Following this stunt

Not that we see them
The boy was only two weeks
At the last visit

"Far away Grandma
and Grandpa" they sign the cards
Far away, my ass

They live one hundred
miles from us, not Egypt
Cry me a river

Sorry for the biting tone of this post. I had been lulled into a sense of calm in January when the MIL was radio silent and only sent stupid letters in the mail detailing the weather. I knew something was coming, what with Valentine's Day and all. I just wasn't expecting another box o' crap shipped Express Mail. They do that to inconvenience us because we usually have to go the post office to pick up signature required items. Asshats.

To read other haiku Friday posts, go here.

21 comments:

anglophilefootballfanatic said...

Seriously! How is it possible to spend four times more shipping than on the contents inside. 100 miles is FAR AWAY? I'm 250 away from my parents, yet they manage to come see me or I see them AT LEAST one time a month. We need to have a meeting of our club, Toni. One where we meet in the middle, get trashed, talk trash, and then head home.

Marie said...

Wow, I don't even know what to say. That is just crazy. How about you visit the dollar store and ship a mother-load of crap to them? I'll go in on the cost of shipping!

Jenni said...

They sound completely clueless! At least they didn't send toys that talk. I have two sets of in-laws. One buys talking toys for every single present, the other set buys talking/dancing/farting etc stuffed animals for every single holiday.

You just can't beat South Baltimore for good taste.

Missy said...

lol at the word "asshats"

my MIL does the same sort of thing.

:) Happy Valentine's Day!

MamaGeek said...

Oh THAT is all sorts of funny. Once again, I can only shake my head. The thought of them spending that much cash on crap is bizarre. I wonder what the asshat's son thinks of this? It's so stressful. Somehow I always vent/take it on my hubby and I know I shouldn't. I share your pain and speak from experience.

Sarcastic Mom (aka Lotus) said...

100 miles? That's less than two hours drive!

Baba's Blog .. Babies Are Special said...

Good evening Toni, wow..why can't they send a card with 5 dollars inside and let your kids save it in a bank for the future?? I live a 5 hour drive from my grands and I drive up to visit them about every 4-6 weeks.They grow up so fast and I hate to miss a moment in their lives.Thanks for your visit today..

suchsimplepleasures said...

so unbelievable!! in-laws suck! if it makes you feel any better...my in-laws are the devils spawns!!!
have a great weekend!

transplanting me said...

so, what would happen if you didn't go sign for the package???

DIXIECHICK said...

My two older boys live 80 miles away, I make that drive round trip twice a month...give me a break. My mom lives 700 miles away, if she lived that close, she would be at my house every week.
I agree with Marie..why don't you start sending her boxes of crap, yard sale stuff you find, just so she has to go and pick the stuff up...

Kathryn said...

Well, on a positive note, I'm sure the garbage can will hold it for you.

Mama DB said...

We get boxes like that but my folks plan ahead and send them ground. I despise all of the crap that is sent and I go on throwing-away binges as soon as the kids lose interest. What a waste.

Happy Friday though!

Nap Warden said...

I know this story...My inlaws are nuts! (Don't tell Husband I told you)

janet said...

wow. that is cuh-razy.

and my parents only live 25 miles away -- and they only see my non-driving kids when i TAKE them there.

it never changes.

secret agent mama said...

If my parents were 100 miles away, they'd be here every weekend!!

Asshats!

The Egel Nest said...

I love the "more money than sense line"

I was thinking "cents" would work there too...lol

very VERY cute!

I have a new feature I am starting over at the nest, please come check it out!

Bradley
The Egel Nest

Marylin said...

oh lucky you :O sometimes in-laws just aren't worth the hassle :S

Scylla said...

You could send them articles on the levels of lead in cheap plastic toys, thereby insinuating that they are poisoning their grandchildren.

(I have similar stunts pulled by similar in-laws.)

Kellan said...

"not Egypt" - ACK!!! You are not happy with these people - I have a MIL that sounds just like your inlaws. Have a good weekend - Kellan

Janet said...

Isn't family fun? At least it made for good haiku.

maggie's mind said...

I'm just now catching up, but wow, that was hilarious, in a sad kind of hilarious way. Crazy.