Showing posts with label in-laws. Show all posts
Showing posts with label in-laws. Show all posts

Friday, February 15, 2008

Haiku Friday

In-laws strike again
Sent box of junk to my kids
For Valentine's Day

Bath mitts, candy hearts
Twenty-four dollars to ship
Stuff worth six dollars

Sent it Express Mail
Signature required, yes
More money than sense

I will not listen
To whining of being poor
Following this stunt

Not that we see them
The boy was only two weeks
At the last visit

"Far away Grandma
and Grandpa" they sign the cards
Far away, my ass

They live one hundred
miles from us, not Egypt
Cry me a river

Sorry for the biting tone of this post. I had been lulled into a sense of calm in January when the MIL was radio silent and only sent stupid letters in the mail detailing the weather. I knew something was coming, what with Valentine's Day and all. I just wasn't expecting another box o' crap shipped Express Mail. They do that to inconvenience us because we usually have to go the post office to pick up signature required items. Asshats.

To read other haiku Friday posts, go here.

Friday, December 21, 2007

Haiku Friday


Gifts from in-laws came
Daughter was upset again
Junk toys, handmade robes

Hand sewn robes, I say!
Made by hand but not with love
Too big, seams fall out

No measurements, 'kay?
My husband's would fit Jabba
Mine is atrocious

Why send gifts like that?
Insulting and not pretty
Trying to hurt us?

Good money wasted
Add these to the bad gifts list
Thanks for the laugh, lady!


So, it happened again; the old bag, I mean my MIL sent her annual boxes of crap and insults. This time it was homemade robes. Ugh! Too big, badly sewn, U-G-L-Y. What's more to say? I know, it's the thought that counts. But, in this case, is it? Did she make them to be nice or insinuate my husband and I were the size of UPS trucks? Honestly, though, when I made RxMan try on his (above), I freakin' peed my pants from laughing. Honest!

Happy Holidays from me to you and yours!

Go see more Haiku fun here!


Thursday, November 29, 2007

Thursday Thirteen # 4: Worst Gifts I Have Ever Received

1. A Tree.
I was 21. Lived in apartment. Not really practical.
2. A Hyacinth.
Given for my 16th birthday at my uncle's funeral calling hours. Classy, huh?
3. Clothing saying stuff about dieting.
Just. Not. Funny.
4. A Book On How To Improve Your Troubled Marriage.
Given by my aunt and we weren't having trouble.
5. A Used Sweetshirt Bearing My High School's Logo
Another aunt who was a yard sale junkie and proudly told me she got it at a yard sale after I opened it.
6. Tweety Bird Chia Pet
My Mother In Law gave this to me the second Christmas I was married to my husband.
7. Tweety Bird Slippers
MIL gave to me the first Christmas I was married to my husband. I loathe all cartoon character clothing.
8. Satin Hummingbird PJs from National Wildlife Federation
Given by, guess who?, MIL for my birthday about 4 years ago; they were made for the 80 year old in your life.
9. Rotten Hillbilly Teeth Pacifiers
Given for son's birth by MIL.
10. Maternity PJs
When I wasn't pregnant; given by MIL.
11. Rooster Deviled Egg Plate
Given as wedding shower gift by MIL.
12. Necklace with S pendant
Given for birthday by MIL; my name is Toni!
13. Red Boy Outfit
Received at my shower for my daughter (&, yes, we knew it was a girl)! Giver? MIL!

My in-laws do. not. like. me. Did you catch that?

To see more Thursday Thirteens, go here!

Monday, June 18, 2007

In-Laws

Okay, from my previous post you probably gleaned that RxMan and his parents have a shaky relationship at best. Well, yesterday, they pushed it to a whole new level.

RxMan called to wish his dad Happy Father's Day. My husband was angry with them because they came to our county to camp at a local state park at a bad time for us and he was unable to see them. Well, his father was waiting for RxMan to call; he never answers the phone but yesterday answered before the second ring. He basically chewed RxMan up and accused him of always calling their home to fight with them; he said that they were tired of being the bad guys and RxMan being the "victim". He insinuated that I had intentionally kept RxMan and our children away from them. At the end of the horrid conversation that is too nasty and evil (read: evil) to write, he wished my husband a "happy life" and hung up.

I was shocked; surely, they did not just wash their hands of my husband!? So, I called back. Not to fight- honestly. To try to reason with them that despite their dislike of me, it wasn't worth not having anything to do with RxMan. It did not go well. You will be proud of me, though, I did not swear or yell. I tried to keep my cool and did not speak in any mean way to the man who is legally my FIL but for all accounts and purposes is a big, terrible jerk: the Antichrist's brother. He outright said that I had kept my husband and children away from them and he did not care to hear one thing I said. He turned the fact that he and his wife hadn't seen our now seven year old daughter from the time she was 4 months old until she was 5 1/2 years old around on us. He rewrote history by saying all Her Highness's birthday parties had been on Sundays intentionally so they could not come because he worked Sunday nights. There was a whole lotta lying going on. My call was fruitless, except for the fact that he finally admitted that they did not like me although they "love me because RxMan does". What?!?!?!

So, my dear husband is without parents. They have written him off. Personally, I think he is better off because they only used and abused him for the ten years that I have been in his life; however, they are the only parents he has known. He loves them and really wanted to share his life and family with them but they cannot have a relationship with anyone who does not do exactly as they (namely, his dad) wish. He is such a good man and my heart aches for his loss. He, though, has seen it coming and was able to get many things off of his chest that have been bugging him for years. RxMan is taking this very well, likely because they have been so absent in our lives since we were married over 9 years ago.

Thankfully, my immediate and extended family love my husband (more than me, most of the time). We have wonderful friends who have been filling the void left by his folks for many years and that will undoubtedly continue. I am vowing here and now that I will not be the MIL that I have had. Please keep me honest to this oath....