Sunday, June 24, 2007

A Sad Day

So, I've been having a week. The Conqueror has been unusually fussy and difficult during the day but, for the most part, is sleeping much better at night. This is difficult for me because I want him to sleep well day and night. Am I expecting too much from a not quite six month old?? Last Sunday night, for the very first time ever, he slept 10 hours. Ten hours. Diez horas. It was so great...not that I slept that long. Oh, no. I was up from 2ish - 5ish worrying if he was dead or not. I know that is weird and morbid but, hey, that is me. I am a worrier. If there is nothing truly wrong in my little world, than I worry about other people's stuff.

Last Sunday, I worried if my precious boy was still breathing. Turns out that he was - thank God; however, the good nighttimes are not necessarily translating into good daytimes. As I mentioned before, I believe he is truly teething so that is a factor, too. But his napping is down from around five hours a day to two. By the time RxMan comes home at 9PM, I am wiped out. I want to kill him because he gets to leave and I just want to go to sleep but feel obligated to stay up until he comes home because Dr. Phil thinks it is best for our marriage.


So, I was already having a bad week when the story about Jessie Davis broke. I suspected that it was the creep of a boyfriend (who is already married) but had hoped she just ran off and, oh, I don't know, joined the circus. I was, sadly, right. This is what kept me awake last night: another pregnant woman murdered, along with her full-term, unborn child. So, so sad. I found out in my Gender Communications class last quarter that pregnant women are 8 times more likely to be the victims of violence than nonpregnant women. Stress is cited as the cause: financial, emotional, etc. What happened to the days when men just up and left and were never heard from again? The fact that this child and its mother are dead is haunting me. Not to mention the fact that there is another 2 year old whose mother is dead and father is on his way to prison for murdering her in front of him. (shudder)

No lighthearted posting here today. I am horribly saddened by these turn of events, as well as learning of the suicide of a local mother of three. Again, not really someone I had a personal, close relationship with but she was a patient of a dentist I worked for some 8 years ago. I am down about all of this senseless loss of life. I wonder what is really so bad that it warrants taking your own life?

So, today, despite all of my personal blessings, my heart is heavier than usual.

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