Snakes, Snails and Pony Tails

AFF answered my plea for blogging topics a few weeks ago with the question "what do you think the difference is raising girls vs boys?" As a mom of an 8 year old girl and a nearly 19 month old boy, I can certainly say that there are differences although I know so many of you, who have more children than I, would be much more qualified to answer.

In my experience, though, the differences are quite surprising and typical of what you would probably expect. My daughter was/is quiet, polite and sweet. She is obedient and kind. So far, my son is none of these things.

When Claire was a toddler, a firm "no" and a disapproving glance often stopped her cold. If I raised my voice or said her full name? Oh, my goodness, she would wail. She liked hats, dresses and hated bugs. She truly was sugar and spice but perfect? No. She whined. All. The. Time. I understand language development and that she didn't have the words but good gawd could that child whine...She whined so much I taught her to go to her room while she whined and cried unless there was a good reason for it- of course, she was more like 2-3 when that was enforced.

Liam, though, eats ants. He climbs things. He is covered in bruises and I find myself explaining to people that he is just busy and I am not a child abuser, despite the temptation. He doesn't whine unless he is ill or sleepy. Tantrums, though, are monumental. And I do mean the throw himself on the ground and have a royal fit kind of tantrum. He loves to be outside and into things and is always busy.

So, for me, my kids fall into stereotypical roles. Did I encourage them? Of course sociologist and behaviorists would say yes but I think Liam was just born more aggressive than Claire. He speaks louder and is more physical than she ever was. Claire has a very nurturing personality and is nice and always has been.

With Liam, I find that I have to raise my voice louder and more often than I ever have with Claire; she was more responsive to a verbal cue. He needs removed and touched to be signaled that his behavior is inappropriate. I am told by others that this is just "being a boy."

I have been told that boys are more difficult in the early ages and girls more so in the teen years. For me, I have a feeling this is going to hold true because Claire has been a real breeze to date but Liam kicks my ass every day.

To be honest, I was disappointed that I was having a son when we discovered that we were at 18 weeks. You see, I liked buying dresses and hats and ruffly socks. The boys clothing department is smaller than my closet and how many pairs of navy shorts can one kid have? But, I feel really badly now for my early disappointment because that little ant eating, cat chasing, stinky boy? He loves me so completely and differently than Claire (a daddy's girl from her first breath) did at this age. And I adore him too. There really is something magical about the relationship between a boy and his momma.....

I just hope that this special relationship doesn't translate into trouble when he starts dating because I don't want to be that MIL. You know, like mine. And hers. And hers.

All Boy

I have complained lamented often lately about my son's bad behavior. The hitting, biting, scratching and otherwise aggressive behavior that is apparently not uncommon to many of you who are also raising cagefighters. That was a relief to find out but I am still perplexed as to how to curb the behavior. The good news is that it really seems to be less often and able to be avoided with proper napping and sleep. *fingers crossed*

I saw some family members on Sunday that I rarely see. They, of course, oohed and aahed appropriately over my children, especially Liam. See, in my family boys, you know the holder of the penis, are particularly prized. Liam is the first boy in about 15 years on that side of the family and, as such, is a bit of a novelty.

My aunts remarked on his new big boy hair cut. They gushed over his use of "thank you" and loved it when he climbed on top of the dining room table. "He's busy, isn't he," they proudly remarked.

Busy, yes. Rotten, yes. He's darling in a daredevil, scare mommy to death sort of way.

But when he found my mother's vacuum cleaner and managed to detach the long attachment and came into the family room wielding it as a weapon, trying to take out the other little ones (girls) in the room, I knew that I was in for it. The almighty penis could certainly not spare him from their wrath as he tried to beat down their granddaughters. Oh, these women were going to let loose on me with a diatribe about "spare the rod, spoil the child" and "when little Billy was that age...."

Uh, was I ever wrong.

In unison, they all giggled as I wrestled the murder weapon it from his hands and he wailed as if I had beaten him with it. Then, one by one, they all nodded and said, "All boy. That one there is all boy...."

So, I guess the next time he tries to go all cagefighter on someone else's kids, I will just smile and say, "oh, that Liam- he's all boy." How do you think that will go over at the park?



**No girls were harmed in the making of this post. The intended weapon of mass destruction was removed from the offender's grasp before he struck.